so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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