i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
