I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
