I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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