This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I AM VODKA MAN
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
