he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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