I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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