problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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