The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
