am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
