They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Randomize
