He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
