so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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