Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize