Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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