He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
