Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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