yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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