break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
