North Korea, Best Korea!
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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