Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
