the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize