the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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