i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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