and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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