I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
