The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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