they need to just BURY HIM!
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
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