it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
