You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
