You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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