I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
bring money and cleavage
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
