Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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