My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
