AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize