I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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