I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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