I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
