I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
