Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
