I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
