Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
