It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
