I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize