his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize