Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
