I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I think my moral compass just broke
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize