Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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