I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
do nipples grow back?
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