If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Semen is not good for contacts.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
